Top 10 signs your organizational measurements will get you into trouble

May 12, 2010

The following list could probably be read in a Jeff Foxworthy style prefixing each item with “You might be a (some derogatory term) boss if …”. However, that would be immature so please refrain from doing that.

Anyway, here are my top 10 signs that you’re about to bring your company down by poor organizational measurements.

10. You have a list of names paired with numbers – The first sign that you’re probably not measuring just for logistics and informative purposes anymore.

9. The list is ordered according to the numbers – You’re probably not looking for teamwork. At least, don’t hold your breath waiting for teamwork to happen.

8. The first name on the list is mentioned below the list in positive terms – So it’s official that it’s every man for himself?

7. The last name on the list is mentioned below the list in less flattering terms – This road isn’t even paved with good intentions anymore. The slippery slope is now a non-stick coated vertical drop.

6. The first name on the previously posted list is no longer on the list at all, he/she is now compiling the list – Now it’s getting obvious how we got into this situation in the first place.

5. The last name on the previously posted list is no longer on the list at all, not even on the payroll – Reason has left the building.

4. The numbers on the list are rising but your actual throughput is decreasing – Oh, the irony.

3. You’ve added another list with other numbers in order to balance the first one – How many lists do you think it’ll take to perfect this?

2. Your name is posted on another list for another audience and it’s moving down – Like father, like son.

1. Random names from the list are disappearing both from the list and from the payroll on their own accord – There are companies out there that know what’s useful to measure.

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